"Urchin Punching For Fun and Profit: Punch Your Way to Tenth Level"
Have you been denied the XP you've rightfully earned by miserly DMs? Are in-game insurance companies and assorted fatcats colluding to keep you down, wallowing in filth and degredation with the zero-level types and sundry scum, when by all rights you should be enjoying henchmen of your own, Inns of quality greater than "poor", and possibly even a quality horse with saddle? If so, know that with my book: "Urchin Punching For Fun and Profit: Punch Your Way to Tenth Level" you will soon learn the secrets of success, the secrets THEY don't want you to know.
I just want to thank you for your book, "Urchin Punching For Fun and Profit: Punch Your Way to Tenth Level." Before UPFFPPYTTL, I kept finding myself dead, corrupted beyond recognition, dead, or dead -- often before even reaching fourth or fifth level. But thanks to your practical advice on the slow and steady pummeling of cherub-cheeked mendicants, I have already attained eight level, and feel that tenth is within easy reach. I hope you'll soon consider a sequel, as I've recently experienced the temptation to try your techniques on a variety of vulnerable non-urchins (for example, fishwives, cripples, and the infirm elderly), but I really hate to take a wrong step and find myself back in the doldrums of being dead.
Someone needs to write a module: Urchins of the Abyssal Alleyway.
I'm going to do it right now!
Here are my initial notes:
-teleporting alley serves as a gateway to Hell
-demons posing as children
-kidnapping other street urchins and taking them to Hell
-PCs must venture into Hell and bring back the still living mortals
-a level 10 adventure
Hah! I can't wait!